Thank you all so much for all of your kind words and support on my previous post. It's great to know that opening up like that is worth it. I hope it had an impact on all of those out there that read but didn't comment. The first thing I've tried to do is be open about what I'm eating. If I get something I shouldn't have, I force myself to eat it in the open. No more hiding. If I'm gonna have a cookie, then everyone's gonna know about it. My Dad made a comment this morning about how difficult it is for my family to see me going through this struggle with Crohn's and then to watch me eat things I shouldn't be eating, knowing that it's unhealthy. They don't harp on me or give me guilt about what I'm doing, I'm a big girl and they're here to support me if I want it, but the truth is, I'm one stubborn bitch (pardon my language!) and they're all too afraid to confront me! I'll just tell them to leave me alone and let me eat my cookies in peace!! Nice, huh??
This week has already seen an improvement. If I eat something I shouldn't, I don't beat myself up about it, and interestingly enough, the temptations are not nearly as strong anymore. Just today my brother offered to pick me up a lunch when he went out to get his, but I barely even thought twice about eating my leftovers. And they were good... I made Carol Fenster's meatloaf again, delicious!! The less I put pressure on myself, the easier it becomes. I know this isn't going to change overnight, but just treating myself a little better mentally is already having a huge impact.
I already know that this is going to be a big year of change for me. I'm ready for it. I'm looking forward to it. I'm excited about what the coming year will bring. Maybe a new job? Maybe some dating? Lots of gluten-free cooking and baking experiments definitely. Maybe even some more exploration into the world of selling baked goods?? The possibilities are endless, but the only thing that will get me there is a positive attitude and that's what I'm working on the hardest. And a Kitchen-Aid Stand Mixer... yeah, that would be awesome. :-)